Some kids are wild, other kids are calm and easy to deal with.
Some of those kids who behave grow up becoming nice, easy going people who do what they are told and conform to the social norm, looking perfectly happy on the inside, yet on the inside being full of fear, terrified of not being loved enough if they for once show any sign of individuality. I see some of them every day on the commute train to work. I ask myself what their lives are like, what turned them into the kind of people who tell their children that you are not supposed to enjoy your work, but get used to it being boring and meaningless. Saying you have to endure this because this is what life is.
Some of these people are my friends. I love them but also know I will never be like them. They probably say the same about me.
Some of these kids grow up, always playing their part in life, not knowing there are any rules or boundaries around them. Because they have never felt the urge to push outwards to see if there is anything out there. Some of these people are my friends too. I love them the same and have probably annoyed them thoroughly trying to show them the chains around their feet that they don’t seem to have. To say the least, they make me confused.
Then you have people like me, who are a slave to the desire of finding freedom. Exploring everything possible to explore, pushing the limits not even knowing what Freedom really is. I do not know where I’m going, only that I have to go. No matter what the price.
I guess I was lucky. Because I never had parents who told me to get used to life. They said, do what you want with life and respected my difference,s my issues and my crazy ideas. There was and is plenty of people around me who tried to tell me how to be, and one of them is myself. This is hard to find out, but my Friends tell me not to be too hard on myself.
This turned out to be quite a different post than first thought of, but all I want to say is this:
Do not be too hard on yourself. All is well.

