Monday, July 14, 2008
Sometimes I wonder how things could turn out the way it did.
The love I had, they perfect relationship. All gone.
I look back at those times and feelings of sadness and wonder come to me. How could it happen?
The love we had, the times we have shared was amazing. Incredible.
Yet, it is all a thing of the past. I can see that it has to stay there.
What is dead has to be buried, so that new life can materialize from it’s ashes.
And even though I can’t see today what will come, and it is hard to understand when tears are falling.
I will soon leave everything behind, and start fresh.
A new life.
A new time.
My Time
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
In every group, every interaction. I feel alienated.
I blend in very well with most groups. People seem to like me. I understand them, share their interests and can honestly relate to them.
Yet, I always feel distant.
Lonely.
Outside and alienated.
I have felt the longing for intimate relationships but I’m starting to think that perhaps being human will always mean to be alienated. Perhaps this is what everyone feel.
Everyone walks around with a deep longing for True intimacy, but not knowing how to get there. Feeling frustrated, but get on with there lives, being ignorant on just how alone they really are.
That veil of ignorance being the protection from the pain of isolation.
Perhaps I notice this only because I am aware of my alienation.
My isolation.
Maybe
Just maybe
It is us trying to reach intimacy, but still staying finite beings. Trying to get True intimacy but not seeing that it is beyond both body and mind. And as long as we identify ourselves to be these finite beings, we will always be isolated and lonely.
Our individuality will always be isolated and separate, and the reason we go wrong is that we so desperately try to reach the infinite, but refusing to let go of our individuality.
Trying so hard to transform the temporary into the permanent.
But the temporary can never become the permanent, because it is already included in the Permanent.
