I’m going now…

 

On bended knee is no way to be free
lifting up an empty cup I ask silently
that all my destinations will accept the one that’s me
so I can breath

Circles they grow and they swallow people whole
half their lives they say goodnight to wive’s they’ll never know
got a mind full of questions and a teacher in my soul
so it goes…

Don’t come closer or I’ll have to go
Holding me like gravity are places that pull
If ever there was someone to keep me at home
It would be you…

Everyone I come across in cages they bought
they think of me and my wandering
but I’m never what they thought
got my indignation but I’m pure in all my thoughts
I’m alive…

Wind in my hair, I feel part of everywhere
underneath my being is a road that disappeared
late at night I hear the trees
they’re singing with the dead
overhead…

Leave it to me as I find a way to be
consider me a satelite for ever orbiting
I knew all the rules but the rules did not know me
guaranteed…

Problems

 

My trip has run into some problems.

Well, perhaps not my trip, but rather my friend Peter’s. He has run into difficulties with his Indian Visa, and will probably be three to four days late to the country.
This means, that suddenly, I have no one to hang out with in Mumbai and I also have to find some other place to stay than originally thought.
For some strange reason, I’m not even stressed about it. I’ll manage.

Somehow.

Timing

 

Today I woke up with a cold.
Really annoying, but I hope I get better before leaving!

It seems my timing the past weeks has been really bad, so, fingers crossed!

Friendship

 

One of my closest friends is a 60-year-old Indian woman, a dentist by profession and living in Chennai. Looking at it from a typical Swedish perspective, it is probably quite strange.
On the surface, we really have nothing in common, but still, when we are in Umas apartment, almost by the ocean, there is nothing more natural than that. We can sit in that apartment for hours without actually talking to each other. Words are unnecessary.
I never thought it could be like that.

When I was growing up I always had difficulties around people who wasn’t like me. People I couldn’t immediately relate to.
People who are different from me was exhausting to be around, for the reason that they are unpredictable. It was too tough to handle for my perfectionist, controlling mind.
Luckily, my need for control has, slowly but surely fallen away, and thanks to that, I not only appreciate people who are different from me, I notice myself drawn to them.

We are afraid of people who are different from us, because we do not know how they will behave. They could harm us. But when we are released from that fear, when we are secure enough to handle the unknown (which is wrong, you don’t handle the unknown, we learn to live with it), the possibility arises to meet people who we had previously avoided. In this meeting there is a chance for real contact.
To be human is to be in constant relationship with ourselves and others, and if we are afraid of relationship, we are also afraid to live.

Thanks to couchsurfing.org I have during my short time there as a member already had time to meet many wonderful people.

It gives me hope.

Hope that the world is not as bad as it seems, and that if we go out and meet it with open arms, we will find that despite external differences in occupation, nationality, education, religion or sexuality, we are deep down, exactly the same. We are all human beings, with the same needs and desires.
Then, we can sit in a cool apartment in the sweltering Indian heat, listening to the honking of vehicles passing by, reading a book and for a moment share our lives with someone who is just like us.